When Life Goes Off-Script…Ending 2024

Howdy folks! 😊 And welcome to the last day of 2024!

From my casual observations online and elsewhere this week, very few people are talking about how amazing this year was, but rather how difficult the year has been, and all the battles they have fought.

If you’re among those, I hear you completely, and I can safely say that I too had my hands full on every side. And by the end of Q1, one of my biggest hopes for the year was already dead and buried, while the other lay sputtering on the ground coughing up blood 🤭. I knew right then that the year was going to be violent.

Q2 came in and brought with it its own disappointments and crises, and not to mention the economic challenges we are facing in these parts – money just doesn’t stretch as far as it used to anymore.

The days wore on and I began to feel like the year had gone ahead of me, albeit off-script, and I was running behind it trying to catch up.

I’m not sure what your personal reflection process is like at the end of the year, but I’d imagine it would be equally disappointing if it turned out that you had more losses than gains at the end of the year.

So what do you do when you walk through one of those seasons when things just don’t go your way? Nothing seems to make sense, and life goes Off-script?

Only when we cede our control can we truly see that All things may not be pleasant, but All things do work together for good to them that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose, Romans 8:28. There is nothing that catches God by surprise. Not our circumstances, not our epic fails, our grievous sins and not even our most glorious mistakes. They can all be used in God’s hands as tools, for our good.

Growth seldom follows a linear path, but God uses the ups and downs that come, the setbacks and the unexpected turns to mould and shape us into who we ought to be.

At some point in the year, this became my central focus. Not just what needed to be done and what needed to be achieved. But also what God was doing in me, and who I was becoming on the other side of this chapter. Because those too were important gains.

If you’re feeling down about what didn’t work out in 2024, here are a few things from my personal reflections that I would suggest to you :

1. Acknowledge the disappointment: There’s no need to pretend here – it’s important to validate your feelings of frustration, disappointment, or sadness. You can be honest with yourself, and you can be honest with God. You did have an expectation, and therefore disappointment is only natural when that expectation is not met. These emotions shouldn’t define and overcome your entire journey. But acknowledge them for this moment because they are real. And processing those emotions also stops your heart from becoming bitter – from which nothing good can emerge.
2. Did you learn anything from the situation?: Instead of thinking of the year as a series of unmet expectations, consider it a journey of learning. What did you learn from every single thing that went wrong? Have you gained anything from the negative experiences? Are you wiser in your dealings? Will you be more cautious in the future? Have you learned a new skill? Has your reasoning and decision making improved? Even setbacks and detours can provide valuable lessons that help you grow and improve. Every year teaches us something, even if it’s not in the way we expected. Don’t let the pain go to waste.
3. Notice and celebrate the small wins: Sometimes, the growth and accomplishments we make aren’t immediately visible in the form of big, tangible outcomes, like a new car or bigger house. But the smaller steps you’ve taken are still worth celebrating. As earlier mentioned, wisdom gained, skills learned, personal growth, relationships deepened, resilience built—these count as achievements too, and should be celebrated. Because you are not the same person you were, prior to that. So, even if the grand plan did not work out, there may have been smaller victories along the way that counted. Quiet miracles for which we can still be thankful. 🙏🏽
4. Be kind and patient with yourself: *Enter all perfectionists and serial planners here 🤭* It’s easy to fall into self-criticism when things don’t go as planned, especially in areas where you seemingly had some control of the situation. Like academic pursuits for example or maybe you even messed up a romantic situation. Or perhaps it was something at work. The reality is we are not all powerful, and we are not all knowing. Must we do our best? Yes. But when failure comes despite your best efforts, remember to treat yourself with the same understanding and kindness you would offer a friend in a similar situation. Again, progress is seldom linear, and every setback is an opportunity to learn and do things better. Show yourself some compassion.
5. Evaluate your goals and adjust accordingly: Instead of throwing out the list of goals, and ripping up the New Year’s resolutions in frustration, take time to critically evaluate your goals and see whether they are still important. Are they still worth pursuing, and why? Sometimes, the goals we set at the beginning of the year are based on external expectations or outdated visions of what success once looked like. Evaluate whether your goals are still aligned with who you are now, with all that you now know, and what you truly want. If the answer here is negative, drop accordingly. If positive, then it may be reason to try again, but with a different strategy perhaps.
6. Take Responsibility and focus on what you can control: There are always aspects of any situation that are within your influence, even if it’s just your attitude. Recognize where you do have power, and take ownership. Take those steps that depend on you, and own them completely. Apply for those jobs, research that business opportunity, speak to that person and do everything that is in your power to do. After all, nothing moves until you do, right? Do your part, and then let God do His. 😊
7. Embrace Flexibility and Adaptability: In the best case scenario, we expect immediate results, in a particular format, and in a particular timeframe – but some things do take time to come to fruition. Or may require additional support, or a different kind of effort. Be patient with the process and allow for natural ebb and flow in your progress. Life is full of surprises, and being flexible can be your greatest aid. Be sure to extend this flexibility also to the timeframe – It could be plus or minus the actual calendar year, but remain focused.
8. Look to the future with Optimism: While reflecting on what hasn’t worked out is important, and perhaps retracing some of our steps too, it’s also crucial to look forward. Forget the former things and press on to what lies ahead. The future holds so much potential for new opportunities and growth. And each day is a chance to take new actions, and learn from our previous ones. Set your sights again on what you can still accomplish, and what lies in store for you on the other side of letting the past remain in the past. The chronological year may have ended, but your life hasn’t. And while there is breath, hope remains. 🙏🏽

And last but not the least, Remain in Faith: This right here is my bonus point. Remain in faith that God still has a plan for your life, and that His plan is good. He has promised to give you a hope and a future. And ours is to trust Him to guide us through every forest and meandering valley, until we get to our expected end. The journey may not always be smooth and easy, but there can still be purpose, and beauty in the madness. 😊

I’m curious to know what 2024 was like for you, and what lessons you will be taking with you into the New Year. Feel free to drop me a line.

Wishing you an Awesome Year ahead, filled with love and blessing!

xoxo 💕

Lubaya